a journey through the Pacific

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Went swimming today. * Tired & partially chao ta*
Just wanna share something that i came across today.

Version 2 of NKF Saga.
(Note: Excuse the poor grammer usage & occasional use of expletives by the author)

Clerk: Hear me hear me. Judge is in the house. All rise.
Everyone rise

Judge: So which case am I presiding today?
Clerk: Your honour, please refer to case #234, NKF's defamation suit against SPH.
Judge: Sounds exciting. Will the defending counsel like to proceed?
Counsel Singh: Your honour, I will like to call the plaintiff Mr TT Durai to the stand.
Mr Durai approaches the stand.

Clerk: Mr Durai, will you please place your right hand on the Bible and do solemnly swear?
Counsel Khoo: OBJECTION your honour! My client is a hindu.
Judge: Who cares
Everyone laugh

Judge: Joking lah. Objection sustained.
The bible is promptly replaced with a set of Hindu scriptures.

Clerk: Mr Durai, will you place your right hand on the scriptures and do solemnly swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the god damn truth, god dammit.
Durai: I do.
Clerk: You may now kiss the bride.
Everyone laugh again.

Judge: * Wiping tears from his eyes * Oh man, this joke never fail to crack me up. Well done clerk. Counsel Singh, you may carry on.
Counsel Singh: Mr Durai, have you at any point of time installed a gold-plated tap in your bathroom?
Durai: No I didn't
Counsel Singh: LIAR YOUR HONOUR! HE'S A LIAR!
Judge: * Startled * Ni nabeh. You nearly make me pee in my pants.
Counsel Singh: Pardon my sudden outburst your honour. I would next like to call upon a witness, Ms Yati Sudoharto, maid of the plaintiff.
A gangly woman approaches the stand.

Counsel Singh: Ms Yati, while you were cleaning Mr TT Durai's office, do you happen to notice a gold-plated tap installed in his bathroom?
Yati: Apa ini?
Counsel Singh: Nice one Yati. Trying to play dumb with me is it?
Yati: Apa?
Counsel Singh: Apa indeed Ms Yati. But you don't fool me one bit.
Yati: Apa apa?
Counsel Singh: If you apa one more time Yati, I'm going to shove your apa up your ass and then it will really be apa ini for you. Ya hear me. Let me ask you again, did you or did you not see a gold-plated tap installed in Mr Durai's bathroom while you were cleaning his office?

Long silence.

Counsel Singh: Come on Yati, no one can help you now. Why don't you just spit it out?
Yati spits on the floor.

Counsel Singh: Kaninah. I don't mean this kind of spit lah.
The whole room erupted with laughter.

Counsel Singh: Yati, if you still avoid the question, the court will have no choice but to send you back to Bandah Aceh and we all know what Aceh is like right now don't we? Hur hur.
Yati: You bad person. Yati no like you.
Counsel Singh: Like I care Yati, like I care. One last time Yati. Did you see a gold-plated tap installed in Mr Durai’s bathroom while you were cleaning his office?
Yati: Yah lah.
Counsel Singh: Ah ha! * looking damn smug * What do you say to that now Mr Durai?
Counsel Khoo: OBJECTION your honour. Counsel Singh is showing off.
Judge: Overruled. Being MM Lee's personal lawyer, it's only right that we allow Counsel Singh to show off once in a while. Counsel Singh please carry on.
Counsel Singh: Thank you your honour. Mr Durai, will it now occur to you that your defamation suit against my client now appears to be ill conceived?
Durai: Damn you Singh. Damn you and your turban.
Counsel Singh: Your honour, to 'kill off' this case, I like to call upon my next witness. He's none other than (long pause for dramatic effect) " The Contractor".
The whole room goes Ooooooooo. Some even soil their pants.
An Ah Pek approaches the stand.

Counsel Singh: Mr contractor, am I correct to say that you are the one responsible in installing the tap?
Contractor: Ha nah.
Counsel Singh: Were you asked to install the gold-plated tap in Mr Durai's bathroom?
Contractor: Si lah. That An Neh said he only want the best and he told me to install the gold one from the catalog loh.
Durai: * looking agitated * Ok dammit. We did install a gold-plated tap. There I admit it. But I see nothing wrong with it. It was entirely within the guidelines and regulations of the board. Everything that was done was above board.
Counsel Singh: You know Mr Durai, with regards to what you just said, we Sikhs have a old saying, " Milakum nahbahsoli Krisnatham". It means " What a pile of bullshit".

Counsel Khoo: OBJECTION your honour. Counsel Singh is insulting my client.
Judge: Overruled. Not only is Counsel Singh allowed to show off, but he is also entitled to make sarcastic insults now and then. No choice. MM Lee's personal lawyer mah.
Counsel Singh: Thank you your honour. With the testimonies of the two witnesses, we can safely conclude that the article in question, which was printed by my client, has in no way defame Mr Durai in any capacity but was simply reporting and conveying the facts to its readers. Facts which we have already proven in this court. As such, I would like to end the session now and throw out this suit not only because of its ridiculousness but also because I'm getting hungry.

Counsel Khoo: OBJECTION your honour. I haven't had my turn yet.
Judge: Objection my ass. I'm getting hungry too. Let's adjourn for makan before resuming the session.
Clerk: Hear me hear me. The judge is leaving for makan. All rise.
Everyone boh hew the clerk.

Posted by PC @10:56 PM | 0 comments

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

It was only a 40mins video, but it was more than sufficient to feel & share Sensei's passion for Kosen-rufu. The message intended to be delivered was crystal clear - world peace.
But the thing that amazed me the most was his sense of humor.

Sensei is no longer the stern-faced leader that i once presumed, but more like a ...grandfather with the Garfield smile ..Lol..

Posted by PC @11:22 PM | 1 comments

Saturday, August 27, 2005

The train ride to boon lay every morning has starting to become a torture. Why? Because of ppl who cant be bothered to bathe and brush their teeth. There is always at least one such uncle who will sit beside me every morning. Initially i thought maybe its due to bad luck that i always kena these ppl but later i finally realised why - there are soOo many of them it becomes inevitable to escape this morning torture.
Besides smelling bad, they love to breathe out through their mouths and as i said, brushing teeth is not really their forte so imagine what iszit like sitting next to them.
Just when u thought passive smoking is bad...
For convenience, I shall address these uncles as the smelly frogmen.
If you think the cleaners that stand behind garbage trucks smell bad, these frogmen are infinitely worse. I must congratulate them cuz they never fail to revitalise me in the morning, better than any amount of Nescafe.

So what can we do to save innocent ppl from having advanced emphysema?

Besides having police patrols at MRT stations, they should have a small task force to protect all passengers from toxic harm. There will be oral & body hygiene detectors, guarded by soldiers wearing chemical suits with decomtamination kits ready by the side.
So whenever a frogman is identified, he will be dragged immediately away by our chemical personnel & banished to another train with some other similar Banglas who also like to molest ladies in crowded trains. And because they all smell so bad, it becomes more difficult to smell themselves. The frogmen will then be molested by the bored banglas cuz there are no ladies around and they will swear never to smell again.

We should also have oxygen masks on trains, just like in airplanes. If a handful of frogmen managed to escape the detectors and sneak in, an alarm will then be triggered and an emergency declared. Oxygen masks will then automatically drop from the top so that passengers can be saved.

Lol..i think im bored..

Posted by PC @9:48 PM | 2 comments

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Had dinner with Mathew and Weijun at Suntec.
Was thinking a little about past decisions that i had made - crucial, major ones.
If i had gone with my parents' wishes 3yrs back when i was applying for a JC, my life would probably have changed. Instead, i chose to go my own way, for a reason that i sometimes regretted up till today... Same goes for NS.
Dont be mistaken..im happy with what im having now.
After all, these decisions and the resultant outcome of the consequences of the effort that i had expended, or lack thereof, had moulded me to be the PC i am today.
Having said all these, we must be mindful that we live for the future, not the past. What's impt is to make the right decisions from now on.

Posted by PC @10:42 PM | 0 comments

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Was looking through the list of phobias in today's MindYourBody:
Fear of school (Didaskaleinophobia) - i can empathize..haa..Just thinking of those endless tutorials and exams is enough to make anyone cringe.
Fear of marriage (Gamophobia) - Marriage may be a big commitment but there's nothing to be afraid of. I mean it cant be that scary having a wife who may boss you around and maybe nag all day right?Lol..
The most outrageous phobia - fear of vegetables!! (Lachanophobia)
I know of ppl who dislike vegge, but fear? Rest assured that commander Vegge is not about to go to war with humans with his vegge army..lol..

Posted by PC @7:27 PM | 0 comments

Monday, August 22, 2005

I questioned myself once: Are we the makers of our own fate or merely pawns in some divine chess game? Mavis said that our fate lies in our hands. That led me to question the theory of cause & effect: If it's a person's karma to contract cancer, wldnt it be accurate to say that he's fated to haf the terminal illness? Thereafter, he may chant more daimoku and thus lesson his suffering but wldnt it already prove that our fate isnt entirely in our hands?
As such, iszit fate that brought me to the gohonzon or due to my own decision that i first accepted sikang's invitation to join YCF, where i chanced upon Daishonin's teachings and eventually take up faith? I chose to believe in the latter.
So is our fate really in our hands? Not entirely. But we live in a generation who would like to believe that we are in control of our future, and that belief is not too far from the truth either.

Posted by PC @10:10 PM | 3 comments

Sunday, August 21, 2005

PM Lee said by 9th August 2015, Singapore would be a new global cosmopolitan city with world-class attractions. By then i would be like 30yrs old?Omg..
Er..can they like mabbe ask the construction workers to dig faster or smthing?Lol..
Was hoping he would sae NS can be shorten by another 4mths den i can ord in dec!..haa..
Dream on..

Posted by PC @10:29 PM | 1 comments

Saturday, August 20, 2005

By building solidarity rooted in an empathetic recognition of our shared humanity - the universal desire to protect ourselves and those we love from harm - I believe we can make the 21st century an era of genuine reverence for the sanctity of life.

Sensei Ikeda ( The Straits Times - 15/08/2005)

Posted by PC @12:27 AM | 3 comments

Friday, August 19, 2005

The study meeting 2dae was interesting but it was difficult to concentrate with a stomach flu; there was the constant urge to throw up and walking seemed to exacerbate the problem. Went for the meeting with an empty stomach as a result :(

Posted by PC @11:56 PM | 1 comments

Monday, August 15, 2005

Just went to watch land of the dead. More like a comedy than a horror movie. The zombies looked like clowns and i could not help but laugh for most part of the show; the only horror was the relentless screaming from the aunties sitting behind us.

Posted by PC @11:20 PM | 0 comments

Sunday, August 14, 2005

Although science and religion have long been in collision, it is fashionable to portray this ongoing battle as a mutual accommodation.
Attended a public forum on the topic of life & death at TSC this afternoon . What started as a dry presentation soon erupted into an interesting discussion during the Q&A session . More often than not, the speakers were compelled to digress as the Q&A discussion was awashed with sensitive topics like abortion and cloning. One asked: When we clone A, does the clone has the same karma as A? Answer is definitely no, cuz even though they may look identical they wld lead different lives, react to the same situation differently and have different experiences.
Another asked: Wld chanting lots of daimoku help to influence an external source, eg. wld some1 get an A for his exam if he chant lots of daimoku even though he knows that he wld do badly for his exam? To quote the speaker's reply: " So u saying if that guy onli handed up half a sheet of paper, even though he may chant like mad after that, u think the teacher will be stoopid enuf as to give him that A? If there is such a school, pls let mi know cuz i'll enrol my son in that school too." Lol..
Speaking of common sense...

Posted by PC @9:06 PM | 0 comments

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Ok..been thinking of creating a blog for a long,long,long time but didnt have the time to actuali start until 2dae..lol..
Went escape theme park 2dae with sikang and company. The craziest ride was the roller-coaster. The first thought that came to my mind when i saw the course--the person who designed it must be a sadist..lol..The first thing was a 90degrees turn to the right and the roller-coaster was accelerating towards it. Common sense tells you that u shld slow down but apparently the train didnt get the point. I was pretty certain we were all going to kiss the wall until the train did an abrupt turn w/o braking. It was such a sharp turn that we were thrown to the left and my left thigh suffered a bruise. I didnt want to scream at first but when i saw another 90degrees turn i started to scream too..lol..Nxt was the haunted house. It was onli the size of a classroom and i was wondering how terrifying can it be. Elvin, sikang and me went in and becuz it was so dark and so eerrie we ended up holding each other's hands..haa..
The most exhilarating ride was one with the 360degrees turn..we were at the mercy of the machine and it reminded me of chicken wings over a barbecue pit...

We went to Nestor Torres' concert after escape. It was the second time that i went to watch, but this time i went as a believer. The difference was distinctly palpable.. i finally understood the beauty of his music and when he played the wonderful law of the sutra i was realli touched..

Posted by PC @11:31 PM | 1 comments